The Dementors are BREEDING.

IT'S TRUE. It is cold and misty outside. Many muggles are in despair, it's so sad.

Reminder: I am not an interesting person. Moving ON!

I'm realizing you may not know a lot about me (she says as if anyone is actually reading this). Let me enlighten you, my imaginary friend.

My name is Lindsay (obviously). I'm 19-almost-20 years old. I'm from Littleton, Colorado. Before you ask, no, I didn't go to Columbine High School.

One time, when I was about 3 years old, I downed an entire bottle of my mom's allergy pills while bored at the bank. I'm pretty sure my first memory is laying in the hospital, screaming for my parents not to leave, about to have a tube shoved down my throat. I don't remember a lot of details, but of one thing I'm sure: having your stomach pumped while you're still alert is NOT pleasant. AVOID IT AT ALL COSTS.

I am a major league spaz. It's impossible for me to go through a day without injuring myself in some way. Bella's got nothing on me. I'm six feet tall. *pause for gasp* My hair is in the no-man's land between red and blond; it mostly looks like peanut butter. My skin basically glows in the dark. I have kevlar and titanium in my ankle.

There, that's enough of that. It's nice to meet you. Hopefully if you DO read this, you'll leave a comment, and then I'll respond, and then we can be FRIENDS.


I'm assuming all of you lovely people are reading Maureen's blog. If you're not, you should give it a try, because she's fabulous. I have to say, I have seen that Reese's Puffs box (which she mentions, it talks about 18 things to do before you're 18), and it has always struck me as ridiculous as well. I like her list a lot better. I've done most everything on it. But I will work on doing some of them more often. For example:

"11. Go into a store and pretend not to know how something works

And I mean something really simple, like a mug or a pillowcase or a stapler. Ask for really detailed explanation. Write it down. It will give the people in the store something to talk about for a while. I did it with a toaster. “Push what? Can I only use bread? Does it just make it hot? And what do you mean crispy? Like, it makes it hard? It makes it hot AND hard?” L.O.L."

I have never done this, but I am SO going to as soon as possible. Maybe I'll BLOG about it.
I've definitely talked in a fake accent for an entire day. I don't know why I don't do it more often, but I'm going to start. This also has the advantage of improving my sub-par fake accent-ing(?).

Ok, that's enough rambling.

AWKWARD ENDING.